If you were to make a list of the most significant things in your life, they would very certainly not be things at all—they would be your relationships. Your spouse, children, parents, siblings, and friends are almost certainly more important than your phone, car, house, hobbies, or job. That’s because our interactions develop our personalities and have an impact on what we value. Whether it’s our relationship with God, our family, or our fellow man, we discover meaning and purpose in life through our relationships.
Understanding
Understanding is the foundation of all relationships, including our relationship with God. Consider the relationships you have with other people. How well you understand each other is usually a good indicator of the depth of your connection. Consider the following examples:
Colleagues: Your relationships at work are founded on a collective understanding of the tasks at hand. It is critical to have a clear knowledge of your objectives with your teammates in order to be productive. This shared understanding usually extends beyond the duties at hand to knowing your coworkers’ strengths and abilities so that you can collaborate to complete the work.
Friend: Friends are constantly privy to information about us. That was the start of the friendship. You met someone with similar interests, you shared personal information with them, they listened, and you felt understood and safe. You also took the time to listen to them carefully. This listening and understanding process contributes to the longevity of your friendship.
Spouse: Marriage is a relationship built on a deep understanding that goes beyond just knowing about someone. It’s embracing all that they are—the good as well as the bad—and accepting them for who they are and who they can become. Marriages are sustained by love and trust and require a commitment to each other for both spouses to become one.
Spouse: It’s impossible to believe in God if you don’t know anything about Him. We begin to have faith in Him when we learn about His traits (all-knowing, all-powerful, loving father, etc.). We receive guarantees from God as we act in faith, which broaden our awareness of God and deepen our connection with Him.
These examples show that the depth of our relationship with others—how well we understand each other—determines the level of influence they have on us. Your coworker, for example, may be able to persuade you to improve your presentation, but they are unlikely to have the same level of influence as your spouse or parent in changing significant areas of your life.
To have influence over someone, it’s not enough to just know them well. You must also believe in their motivation; you must believe that they care about you.
Unity
We are constantly urged to collaborate and evolve from independence to interdependence. Interdependence occurs when we pool our various talents and abilities to accomplish something that none of us could do alone—teamwork. People who endeavor to be entirely self-sufficient, believing that they must do everything on their own, or people who rely solely on the efforts of others are both examples of cooperation.
True interdependence or teamwork requires a genuine desire to collaborate. It’s a selfless gift of your skills without regard for what you’ll get in return. Co-dependence, on the other side, is when you participate in or do something in order to have someone else do something for you. This can create a toxic environment, causing relationships to suffer.
The Stages of Team Development
Understanding the stages of team formation and knowing how to respond in various scenarios is one way to improve your ability to work in teams. Bruce Tuckman released his group dynamics theory in 1965, which includes four stages of team development: forming, storming, norming, and performing. He then added a fifth stage, which he dubbed adjourning. Before become a high-performing team, Tuckman believed that all teams have to go through these five stages. This model has proven to be an excellent tool for assisting teams in becoming more self-aware and taking proactive efforts to develop over time.
The graph above depicts the impact of various phases of team development on productivity. It’s worth noting that output may drop during the storming period as team members attempt to establish themselves.
Arrow diagrams, such as the ones below, are another common approach to depict the stages of team development since they highlight how teammates interact during the various phases.
Consider your first day at work. How did you feel at the time? You were undoubtedly nervous, eager, and unsure of yourself, and you were definitely wondering what your workplace would be like. You probably took a peek around the room to see if you’d fit in. During the developing stage, these behaviors and sensations are common. People have gathered in the team, as shown by the arrows, but they don’t have a clear idea of what they’re going to do. Team members are usually enthusiastic, but their output is low because they are still working as individuals rather than as a group.
During the forming stage, group members spend the majority of their time getting to know one another and learning about the project. For example, as you got to know one other, you were probably on your best behavior during your first few meetings, but as time went on, your group began to form standards. Norms are unstated standards that regulate behavior and assist team members in understanding how to collaborate.
What to do during the forming stage:
- Have a clear vision
- Explain the what and the why
- Model good behavior
Leaders must cast a clear vision of what the team will accomplish during the shaping period. Team members don’t need to know every detail or how they’ll carry out their responsibilities, but they do need to grasp what they’re doing and why they’re doing it. “Where there is no vision, the people die,” Proverbs 29:18 (Links to an external site.) warns. If your team doesn’t understand what they’re doing, ask for explanation.
Leaders must also provide an example of exemplary behavior in order to create a culture and norms that will help the team’s success. Members of the team must be comfortable enough with each other and their assignment to engage in the difficult discussions that occur during the storming stage.
Because storming normally occurs when you have to develop something together. It’s conceivable that you’ll come up with different approaches. As you define positions, distribute power, and assign authority, you may encounter conflict. If someone avoids their responsibility or tries to control the group during this time, you may feel forced to protest. You may begin to form character judgments and doubt your ability to achieve your objectives.
The arrows in the storming phase are pointing at each other to show that you’re still dealing with individuals who are trying to form a team throughout this phase. They haven’t decided how they’ll get there, and they frequently struggle to define responsibilities and directions. Although not every group goes through the storming stage, and some never do, those who do are usually more productive because they know how to settle dispute and collaborate.
What to do during the storming stage:
- Watch for signs of conflict or discouragement.
- Reinforce the vision.
- Get clarity on the scope, time, and resources available.
- Encourage respect and acceptance.
- Leaders should demonstrate what the team needs to do.
Keep an eye out for signals that your team is on the verge of storming. When they’re having trouble, remind them of the project’s vision while also clarifying the scope, timing, and resources. Continue to set a positive example. Storming is a useful (and often necessary) aspect of team development. Maintain a courteous tone in your talk and promote individual respect and inclusion.
While the team is storming, it’s critical that you, as the leader, engage with them. This is more than just giving instructions. As a leader, you must roll up your sleeves and show the team what they should be doing.
The group is beginning to work as a team during the norming stage. The arrows illustrate that while the team may argue and have various ideas about how to complete the task, there is now a shared vision and everyone is cooperating. There is a sense of teamwork, and team members take ownership of their accomplishment.
What to do during the norming stage:
- Watch for signs that the team might be going back to the storming stage or engaging in groupthink (decision-making that discourages creativity or free-thinking).
- Encourage openness and collaboration.
- Leaders need to shepherd the group and reinforce the objectives and strategy.
It’s easy to slip back into the storming stage during the norming period. To avoid disagreement, team members tend to be cautious about what they say and do. This may lead to team members refraining from bringing forth fresh ideas. During this time, team leaders must guide the group and foster transparency and collaboration. They must also reaffirm the objectives and strategy so that all members of the team are on the same page.
In the performing stage, the arrows have fused into one, indicating that the team has a cohesive vision and established processes.
This isn’t to say that high-performing teams aren’t open to new ideas. In fact, high-performing teams expect and frequently require diverse viewpoints as long as they adhere to established procedures.
High productivity, motivation, and the ability to work independently characterize this stage. Members of the team are capable, know how to address difficulties, and adhere to the defined framework.
What to do during the performing stage:
- Encourage teams to make decisions and have ownership of results
- Watch for changes that might cause the team to revert to previous stages
Allow the team to make judgments and adjust to new scenarios once they have reached the performing stage. When there is a change in membership, direction, or tasks, teams can quickly revert to the prior stages. Keep an eye out for signals that the team is regressing and assist them in getting back on track.
The majority of teams are formed to complete a certain task. The team normally adjourns once that assignment is completed (ends). Members of the team are either reassigned to other teams or remain with their current responsibilities. When the teams split up, some members of the group may feel bereft or regretful. You may have had similar emotions after being removed from a team. However, just as there will always be another team around the corner, there will always be more projects for you to work on in the future.
What to do during the adjourning stage:
- Celebrate accomplishments.
- Leaders should recognize the work of the team and individual members.
- Identify best practices.
It’s time to rejoice after accomplishing a difficult assignment. It’s critical that the leaders acknowledge the team’s efforts and praise them for their efforts. It’s also a good idea to look over and identify best practices so that you can learn how to replicate your success and help other teams avoid pitfalls.
